Moirails, Cats, and Sopor Slime
by TheProfessionalShooshPapper
Summary: The game is over, but the horrors of it aren't. Can Karkat keep Gamzee sober? Or will he crack under the pressure? And what are these red feelings between them? "GAMZEE THAT FUCKING MEOWBEAST IS NOT COMING IN THIS HOUSE." Psychological Themes. GamKar. Mature Stuffs later.
1. Chapter 1

Karkat leaned against the ugly, rundown brick building, tapping his foot impatiently against the hot pavement. What the fuck could be taking that asshole so long? Sweat dripped down the back of his neck and he groaned, throwing his head back and closing his eyes, unable to bear the muggy heat of the humid summer's day.

A scruffy voice came from beside him, "Sorry bro, didn't mean to keep you up and waiting so long."

"Fucking hell, Gamzee," he sighed angrily, not making eye contact, "We're going to be fucking late. Move your stupid clown ass and let's go already."

With a huff, Karkat shoved his fists into his hoodie pouch and walked beside his annoying asshat of a best friend, eyes set to the ground. Today was an important day. But he couldn't shake the weird feeling he had growing inside his gut. He was nervous, although he would never admit it. About a year has passed since they'd beaten the game. All the trolls got thrown into a newly generated world with the humans. It was rough adjusting to the new surroundings, especially for the higher blooded and Trollian just seemed to disappear along with Alternia and the game. The trolls were lucky to end up right near each other. They all lived within several blocks of each other, besides Gamzee. He lived the farthest away. Gamzee... Karkat was jolted out of his thoughts as a hand grabbed his shoulder. He jumped, craning his head to see who it was.

"Bro," Gamzee mumbled, "Where are we going again?"

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?!" Karkat grit his teeth, seething, "Gamzee..."

Instead of giving a clear answer, the Cancer shook Gamzee's hand off his shoulder and stomped faster down the pavement.

A few feet ahead was a large, white, Victorian-looking building with too many windows. Leading up to its double iron doors was a dirt path lined with trimmed hedges and wooden benches laid out in the sunlight. But the beauty of the place was darkened by the black iron fence lined with barbed wire that surrounded the entire building and it's windows. Not to mention the sign just outside that had large printed letters: "Fallengrove Asylum Center".

Shooting an uneasy glance at Gamzee, he made his way up the dirt path. It felt like a death march, every step weighing heavier than the last. The ugly doors to the asylum waiting to be opened as Karkat slowly led his friend to the precipice. Placing his hand on the door handle, Karkat paused. Was Gamzee ready for this? He sure didn't feel ready himself. His hand was visibly shaking, and he stubbornly clenched it tighter around the handle to make it stop. Taking a deep breath, he pulled the door open and stepped into the building.

Nurses bustled by quickly, holding clipboards, needles, pill bottles, and other medical equipment. There were plain grey, plastic chairs scattered around the waiting room in no real pattern. A few visitors were occupying a corner, probably the family of a patient. Opposite the waiting room was a large windowed area with a sign that said Check in/Check out.

"Hi, name of the patient please?" the lady behind the window asked without looking up.

"Gamzee Makara."

"Alright. The doctor will be with you in just a bit," she smiled, pointing to the plastic chairs.

Pulling Gamzee over to the chairs with him, Karkat sat as far away from the small family as possible.

It wasn't long before a tall, skinny, brownhaired man called for Gamzee. The two followed in silence as the doctor led them to their destination.

"413. Here it is," the man announced to himself, seeming proud, probably for finding the right room in such an endless building. Time seemed to stop as Karkat stood in front of the door. He had a feeling something wasn't quite right. Stealing a glance at Gamzee, his heart was racing. The doctor knocked twice on the door.

"Come in."

"Mrs. Soule, your 11 o'clock patient is here to see you."

"Ah, yes. Let him in, let him in," the lady pressed, "Thank you Nick."

Nick nodded, holding the door open while Gamzee, followed by Karkat, walked into Mrs. Soule's, er, office.

"What brings you here Mr. Makara?" she started, clasping her hands together on top of her desk. To Karkat's surprise, she was actually a troll. Short and jade blooded. Her horns swirled upwards, and around each other once, meeting back at the bases of each horn. She had artificially white hair thrown back into a bun, thickly rimmed, square glasses, and not even a quarter of the fashion sense that Kanaya had.

Gamzee flopped himself onto the couch, his mane of hair falling in his face. Joining him, Karkat rolled his eyes as he attempted to push the rats nest out of Gamzee's sight.

"You can just call me Gamzee, bitchtits."

Karkat's palm immediately collided with his face, making a slapping sound. Of course this fucking juggalo wouldn't understand manners.

"Don't mind him," the Cancer cleared his throat, "It was my idea to bring him here."

Mrs. Soule's eyebrows were furrowed, but she pressed Karkat to go on as she glanced unsurely between the two on her couch.

"See, a little while back, maybe a sweep or two, there was sort of an incident... And as his moirail, I don't know if I could do anything if that incident were to... repeat itself. Understand?"

Nodding, she hummed, "I see. And what was this incident?"

Karkat glanced at Gamzee, unsure how to continue.

"Karbro, I told you it was a motherfuckin' one time thing. I thought we all up an' got our settle on with that shit," the Capricorn pouted.

With no response from the Cancer and his eyes glued to the floor, Gamzee sighed and continued, "Ya see motherfucker, Karkat's all been the opposite of mirthful about some wicked happenings in our past. I got myself all motherfucking up in a rage and lost my head and shit. Some of our best bros got hurt pretty bad... I ain't like I did it on purpose or nothin'. That's why it's called a motherfuckin' accident."

"So," the Jade blood thought aloud, "you're telling me that you, Gamzee, have some trouble controlling your anger? And your moirail, Karkat, brought you here to get help because he's worried he won't be enough to help you next time? If there is a next time?"

"Yeah, bitchtits. That's the motherfuckin' deal here."

"No."

"Huh? You say something Karbro?"

Karkat's expression twisted into a mixture of frustration, rage, confusion, and pain as he abruptly stood up, turning on Gamzee.

"I said NO!"

Now Gamzee was confused, "Uh, no, what?"

"That's not the 'motherfuckin deal here' Gamzee! The deal here is that you lost your temper and you KILLED our friends! Fucking hell, Gamzee, you killed everyone! And you almost killed ME! I- I- How can- I just- You-"

"But Kar-"

"NO! Gamzee, you don't get it! There's no way you could ever get it through your thick, sopored-up thinkpan! I'M FUCKING AFRAID OF YOUR INSANE JUGGALO ASS! BECAUSE GOG KNOWS WHAT'S GOING TO FLIP YOU OFF THE HANDLE NEXT! I'M AFRAID FOR MY PITIFUL, MEANINGLESS LIFE EVERY FUCKING DAY BECAUSE OF YOU."

Mrs. Soule was now standing, prepared to call for assistance if needed, "Okay, let's take a deep breath and everybody calm down. It seems you both have been through a lot. Karkat, if you don't mind, I would like to talk to Gamzee alone. Please go wait outside."

Without a word, Karkat walked out the door in a trance-like state.

"Sorry about that bitchtits. He gets all up and flustered all the time," Gamzee spoke quietly, his eyes on the closed door.

Once the door was shut, Karkat felt something wet roll down his cheeks. Tears. Great. He was crying. But he couldn't help it. The look that Gamzee had given him made it feel like someone just ripped is vascular pump right out of his protein chute. He'd never seen Gamzee with such an expression. He couldn't do anything to stop the sobs that tore through him as he fell to his knees. He was afraid. He was so weak. What made him think he even deserved a moirail anymore? Such a pitiful and sorry excuse for a troll. A mutant. This was one of those times Karkat just wished Gamzee had killed him back then. He didn't deserve to live.


	2. Chapter 2

"Bro, you been in that room all motherfucking day. Come on."

He could hear Gamzee outside the door, but chose to ignore him. He didn't want to move from the fetal position he was in on the floor in front of his recuperacoon. Since yesterday, Karkat was just moping around in his own self loathing, locked up in his room. For whatever reason, the Capricorn had insisted on following him home and spending the night. He just wanted to be left alone. Why did Gamzee want to stick around if he kept treating him like shit all the time anyway? Was he a masochist? Karkat was beginning to think they both were. Gamzee taking all of his shit. And he, himself, forcing his fear down to be by Gamzee's side. What the fuck was wrong with the two of them?

Karkat jumped at the sound of something being shoved under his door. He stared at the door, listening. Footsteps dragged across the floor and the front door was opened and closed. Then it was silent. Gamzee must have left. He must have gotten fed up with this shit finally. Crawling over to the door, Karkat picked up the paper and resumed his position.

Tears started rolling down the Cancer's cheeks as he looked over the paper. Why? Why did he have to be such a shit moirail? Why did Gamzee have to be such a stupid clown? Why... Why did this bring a slight smile to his face?

The paper had a drawing on it. Nothing amazingly artistic. It was simple. But it was drawn fairly well. A large diamond took up the page. Inside was a cartoonish picture of Gamzee and Karkat's faces. The word Best Friends was scribbled across the bottom with Gamzee's signature clown smiley.

It was a small gesture. But it was enough to pull at Karkat's heart strings.

What an idiot.

Karkat wiped his eyes as he rose to his feet, unlocking his bedroom door and heading towards the kitchen. He plucked a magnet from his fridge and stuck Gamzee's drawing under it. The fridge is the best place to display things like that, right? Whatever.

Gamzee sighed as he walked towards his house. He couldn't stop worrying about Karkat. Yeah, what happened yesterday upset him. But Karkat was still his moirail and they both needed to have a really long feelings jam to sort this all out. He had agreed to go visit Pam, Dr. Soule let him call her by her first name, once a month to check in. She told him to take some sort of pill once a day to keep his mood stable. He still needed to get to the pharmacy to fill out the prescription. Gamzee wasn't that excited about the idea, but if it was for Karkat, he would do anything, and he meant ANYTHING.

As he walked up to his apartment, he thought about packing a bag to go spend another night at Karkat's and make sure he was alright. His decision was made for him when he saw a white slip of paper taped to his door. An eviction notice. Great.

"Motherfuck..."

Grabbing a change of clothes and some bottled sopor, Gamzee trudged his way back to Karkat's.

Inviting himself in, he found the Cancer asleep on the couch in front of the TV. He must have been watching one of his RomComs. The little guy was so cute sometimes. But right now, that wasn't helping Gamzee cool down. He knew he missed paying his rent by a day or two, but eviction? He would have gotten the money together in a couple days. If he could find a job...

"Shit. Fuck. Fucking motherfucker, kicking me out. Wriggler of a bitch."

He threw his bag lazily on the floor beside the couch and flopped himself on top of Karkat. He needed some moirail hugs. Needless to say, Karkat jumped.

"WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK, GAMZEE?! GET THE FUCK OFF ME YOU ASSHAT! YOU-"

"Motherfucking shut up," Gamzee grumbled, "I'm not all up and in the motherfucking mood to be listening to your harsh words."

No way.

He felt Gamzee's arms tighten around his waist.

Karkat froze underneath the crushing weight of the juggalo.

No.

No. This couldn't be happening.

Gamzee can't go batshit right now.

His vascular pump was pounding in his ears.

"Just motherfucking hug me, motherfucker."

Karkat hesitated before slowly wrapping his arms around Gamzee. Quietly and rhythmically, he began shooshing him.

After a couple minutes, Karkat started to squirm under Gamzee's weight. He was heavy and his body was falling asleep. In response, Gamzee gripped Karkat tightly and rolled off the couch onto the floor, cackling like an idiot. This elicited a screech from the Cancer, who then angrily punched Gamzee's arm. Neither of them moved for awhile. This was actually much more comfortable. The silent company was relaxing and the soft buzzing of the TV was lulling Karkat to sleep. Defeated, he sighed, turning his head towards the TV. He didn't even know when he fell asleep, but he wanted to finish watching his movie. Letting his thoughts wander, his eyes started to get heavy again, becoming accustomed to the soft beating of Gamzee's vascular pump.

"Thanks, bro. Sorry I went and upset you. Just needed to hug a motherfucker," Gamzee spoke suddenly, "I got evicted."

"Don't worry. It happens... Wait. You what?!" Karkat propped himself up on Gamzee's chest to look him in the eyes.

The Capricorn chuckled sheepishly, "I got evicted. Missed my rent payment by two days."

"Dammit Gamzee," the smaller troll grumbled, "We'll get your shit tomorrow and I'll help you find a new place."

Gamzee hummed for a couple seconds, mulling the offer over before replying, "Actually brother, I was hoping I could all up and get some livings going on here."

Karkat let his head fall dramatically, hitting it against Gamzee's chest. Fuck no.

"Fuck Gamzee. Just. Ugh," he sighed, "We'll talk about it tomorrow. I'm too tired for this hornbeast shit."

With harmonious yawns, the two trolls fell into a deep slumber.

"I'M FUCKING AFRAID OF YOUR INSANE JUGGALO ASS! BECAUSE GOG KNOWS WHAT'S GOING TO FLIP YOU OFF THE HANDLE NEXT! I'M AFRAID FOR MY PITIFUL, MEANINGLESS LIFE EVERY FUCKING DAY BECAUSE OF YOU."

Gamzee stares at you, bewilderment twisting into hurt and horror.

"YOU KILLED EQUIUS."

He visibly winces.

"YOU KILLED NEPETA."

Again, he winces, almost shrinking under your rage.

"AND I KNOW THAT WAS IN THE GAME AND THEY ARE HERE WITH US NOW. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING. THAT GAME WAS REAL FOR US ALL AND YOU KNOW IT. YOU'RE A BLOODTHIRSTY HIGH BLOOD. NONE OF US ARE SAFE AROUND YOU," you continue screaming, pointing your shaking claw in his face.

At this point, he's fallen to his knees, "Bro, I-"

"SHUT UP. DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO MAKE ANY EXCUSES FOR YOURSELF, YOU PIECE OF SHIT. I CAN'T BELIEVE I EVER CALLED YOU MY MOIRAIL. SOME MURDEROUS, CHUCKLE VOODOO WORSHIPING, JUGGALO. NO WONDER YOUR LUSUS LEFT YOU."

You could see the tears beginning to form in Gamzee's eyes, but you didn't care. This guy. He wasn't your friend. He was not your moirail. He was a monster. Best friends wouldn't try and kill each other. No baring to look at this monster's face any longer, you turn you back to him, crossing your arms over your chest.

"Best friend," he chokes.

You voice is calm, just above a whisper as you speak, "A true best friend wouldn't kill their friends. And my best friend, wouldn't try to kill me."

With that, you leave the room, leaving Gamzee sobbing on the floor.

Karkat jolted upright, breathing heavily and feeling overheated. Something moved under him, making him roll onto the floor. Gamzee. Gasping, he pushed himself away as fast he could.

After sitting there staring in silence for a minute, he started to calm down. It was ok. Gamzee was asleep. Gamzee was sober. Gamzee wasn't dangerous. Right now.

Recollecting his dream brought back memories of the previous day in Dr. Soule's office. The look on Gamzee's face. How his eyes shadowed over in a pained expression. And that pain stabbing right through the Cancer's heart. No matter how hard he tried not to let it, a small sob escaped his chest.

Gamzee stirred, his mane of hair sticking out in every direction as he strecthed him self into a sitting position.

Quickly, Karkat tried to wipe the tears off his face. Yeah, Gamzee was his moirail, but he refused to cry in front of anyone. It was a sign of weakness. He was not weak.

"Karkat?"

The Cancer didn't answer.

Scooting over to sit next to his moirail, Gamzee wrapped his arms around the smaller troll in a comforting hug.

The Capricorn didn't know what was going on with his best friend, but whatever it was, he was here to help Karkat through it.

Karkat was internally struggling with his emotions and his thoughts. But the one thing that was clear to him was, no matter how afraid he was of Gamzee, he couldn't live without the stupid clown. Gamzee was his anchor in the midst of his sea of troubles. And he never wanted Gamzee to leave him.


End file.
